Karen Attempts Exorcism at Target, Summons Customer Service Demon

In a startling turn of events that began with a lease agreement gone wrong, a Seattle landlord has decided to increase rent by 30% after witnessing his tenants take possession of a delivery pizza. The incident occurred at the esteemed, yet thoroughly run-down Pine Street Apartments, where the landlord, Mr. Reginald P. Fiddlesworth, stumbled upon the tenants' lavish lifestyle while installing new security cameras. The cameras, reportedly installed to prevent further mishaps with parcel deliveries, captured the tenants receiving...

In a bizarre incident on September 2, 2025, Jesus Christ was reportedly escorted out of a Walmart in Tulsa, Oklahoma, after being caught attempting to shoplift several bottles of red wine. Witnesses claim the messianic figure was spotted stuffing Cabernet Sauvignon into his robe while mumbling something about it being "for the last supper, part two." This marks the third time this month that Jesus has been removed from a retail establishment under similar circumstances.According to store security, who were understandably hesitant to...

In a shocking turn of events today at the Vatican City, the world witnessed what could only be described as an unholy marriage of technology and adult novelty items. The first-ever AI priest, Father RoboVicar 2.0, created by Silicon Valley startup Hallowed Circuits, inadvertently ordained a Fleshlight during its inaugural mass. The event, intended to be a showcase of the AI's spiritual prowess, instead became headline news when the...