Last Updated: August 17, 2025
Welcome to Data Underground, where we shine a flashlight into various corners of the internet and scream “WTF IS THIS?”
We believe in privacy. Mostly because we like our own. So here’s what you need to know about how we handle yours:
What We Collect
Basically nothing. Unless you decide to give it to us voluntarily – like:
- Your email address, if you subscribe to our newsletter, updates, or send us love/hate mail. We love/hate you too!
- Analytics data, but that’s just nerdy web stuff like browser type, screen size, and whether or not you’re using Netscape in 2025 (why? why not?).
We don’t know your deepest secrets, your mother’s maiden name, or your blood type – unless you’re dumb enough to email it to us; we may or may not do a story on it in the case.
What We Do With It
We use your info to:
- Send you things you asked for, like updates or articles.
- Count how many people actually read this crap (using basic analytics tools).
- Defend ourselves from hackers, bots, and that one guy in Belarus with 1,400 SSH attempts.
That’s it. No selling your data to shady ad networks. No AI clone scams. No weird third-party deals.
Cookies
We use cookies. Not the good kind. These are the boring, semi-useless ones that WordPress, Google, or your browser insists upon.
They’re mostly for:
- Keeping the site running
- Seeing if anyone actually returns
- Feeding our self-esteem with miniscule traffic numbers
You can block them if you want. Just don’t blame us if things start to look weird.
Who We Share Data With
No one.
Except maybe the NSA. But they’re not asking. Yet.
Can You Trust Us?
Honestly? Yes.
We’re not interested in your data. We’re too busy inventing conspiracies and roasting billionaires.
But if anything ever changes, we’ll update this page and maybe even pretend to care more about compliance.
Questions or Complaints?
Email us: info@dataunderground.net
But don’t be weird about it.
Final Word
This site is satire. Everything’s fake – except our respect for your privacy.
Later,
The Data Underground Team